My New Favorite Brunch Spot in Fort Greene

I'm working from home today, and decided to check out some brunch-to-go at Green Apple Cafe in Fort Greene—I'd heard it was yummy. Apparently, it closed? (Update: If it were a snake, it would've bitten me) So instead, I stumbled upon Caffe e Vino. The staff was beyond friendly (lots of Ciaos! and door opening) and the restaurant was full of doctors in scrubs from the hospital across the street (a good sign, I think, that it's got a chance at success). But what about the food? I ordered egg and cheese on a croissant, expecting to get just that; when I got home, I discovered a neatly packed container with perfectly fluffy eggs mixed with Swiss cheese laid over a croissant, plus a medley of potatoes with onions and tomatoes, plus an awesome salad -- often small salads that people throw in like this suck. (Even Bar Tabac, one of my favorite restaurants ever, could improve on its side salad.) And, they also gave a generous side of bread. All for only $8. And it was amazing! Seriously delicious.

In December the Village Voice reported that Caffe e Vino's menu looked rather bland -- well, the food is anything but. I'm definitely going back for dinner.

Caffe e Vino, 112 DeKalb Avenue, Fort Greene, Brooklyn

Not Only Do Long Island City Delivery Men Lack Balls, But They Also Like To Taunt You With Food You (Apparently) Can't Afford

So I've had my share of troubles with Long Island Shitty's delivery men. But no one has ever brought food to my door, dangled it in front of me and then shrugged and walked away with it.
I will explain. I have no cash and no money in my checking account. I have only one way to make purchases right now: a Visa gift card with $30 left on the balance. There is definitely at least $30 left on the balance because I just checked the balance online. So I called this greasy little piece of hell (whose Web site advertises it as "not your ordinary, run of the mill diner" - they're right; it's worse) and ordered mozzarella sticks, a Caesar salad and a diet Pepsi. They took the number and expiration date for my Visa gift card; it's easy and works just like a credit card and I've used it at a number of places this weekend, including over the phone. They said, "Be there soon."
Thirty minutes later the delivery jerk shows up with my food. I answer the door with a pen, expecting to sign for my food. He informs me that the credit card has been declined. I tell him that's not possible because I just checked the balance. We stand in the hallway, going over the numbers together. They are correct. He tells me I have to pay cash. I say I have no cash. He suggests that maybe I could use a different card. I say I can't. He is holding my food and I can smell the mozzarella sticks. He says, "Well, sorry, I have to take the food then," and he leaves, merrily swinging the bag from one hand as he exits down the hall.
I hope he enjoys those mozzarella sticks. And I hope they make him very fat.
Seriously, though: Why would a restaurant even bother to send their delivery guy if your credit card didn't go through? Wouldn't it make more sense to call you and let you know to see if there was some mistake? Not in Long Island City, I guess. Worst. Neighborhood. Ever.

Eat Drink Man Woman: This Week in Food News

If you have the diet of an Olsen twin, check out these places.
If you do like to eat (see gentlemen above), and you enjoy meat and being greased up while you nibble, make a reservation here.
If you eat before you see this performance, you will probably vomit.

I Miss Williamsburg, Where the Delivery Men Actually Have Balls

Some months ago, I moved from Williamsburg, Brooklyn to Long Island City, Queens. I have always hated Queens, but I found this amazing studio with a wall full of windows and a new kitchen and new bath and lots of space; it was too good to pass up. I decided to give LIC a try. So far, I'm disappointed with the neighborhood for lots of reasons: overpriced bodegas, a far-away grocery store, 7 train service interruptions.
But things got worse tonight. I live in south LIC in a very industrial area and there are a lot of places that won't deliver here. But I have a few delivery options, which include: Domino's (nasty), Palace Fried Chicken (nasty), a couple of Chinese places in Sunnyside (often nasty), and Tuk-Tuk, which in my opinion is the best and least greasy option. I end up ordering their Thai food quite a lot.
Tonight I called for delivery and the woman taking my order got quiet when I gave my address. She paused and then asked what my cross street was. I told her and added that's it's not that far and they've delivered here before. Then she explained: Their delivery guy was recently mugged on my street. They took his money, his bike, and the food. And he's scared to deliver here now. Ah, Long Island City, I just love you more every day.